Putting the "I" in "we"

I've noticed recently that I seem to have developed a habit that I never imagined I'd developed. I guess it happens to most people eventually. I've started to refer to myself as "we" in conversations, Facebook posts, and even here on my blog. I find myself thinking in terms of "we" (being me and B) instead of thinking in terms of "me". I guess that's an inevitable part of being in a long-term relationship. I'm by no means insinuating that that's a bad thing, just merely making an observation. 

Friends will ask me, "What are your plans for the holidays," or "What have you been up to lately," and I always seem to find myself answering about what we are doing for the holidays or what we have been up to lately. 

Being the perpetually single gal in my circle of friends, I always used to cringe when my best girl friends would transform into a "we". I asked about you, not you and your boyfriend. I used to see this transformation as a weakness, a sign that my friend's individual identity was fading off into oblivion. It always seemed as though my friend could no longer exist separate from her boyfriend. Perhaps that was just the cycinal single side of me thinking that. It always perturbed me that when I'd ask a friend to hang out or make plans, she'd tell me she'd have to check with him before she could commit. I was angry that she couldn't make plans without first clearing it with his schedule. (For the record, this isn't about just a single friend. I felt this way about all of my friends who were in relationships.) 

Over the past year and a half, I have unknowingly become one of those girls that I once judged and disliked. I am now the one that, before cementing plans with a friend, checks with him. I don't do this because I need his validation or permission. I do this because we share a life together, and I'm not always aware of what is on our social (or personal) calendar. Trust me, B is not a high maintainence guy or the least bit controlling of me, and for that I am thankful. I am a strong and independent woman who does not need permission from anyone to live my life in the way that I choose. I do, however, want to share my life with this man that I love so very much. I want to spend time with h and I want to do things as a couple. 

This transformation from a "me" to a "we" is actually something that I welcome. Shocking. I think it's just interesting and sometimes mind-blowing how our lives can transform into something we'd never imagined without us even realizing it. 

So to all of the other "we" people out there, I'm sorry I ever thought that being part of a "we" made you less of a "you." 

Love,

A